Surprise touchdown scorers, broken Buccaneer parlays and more bad beats
Peyton.
Hendershot.
How many of you just read that name and have no idea who or what I’m talking about? Well, Cowboys fans around the world know his name and both Indiana Football fans out there are screaming “that’s our guy!” as Dak finally threw his first touchdown of the game in the Cowboys win over the Lions late in the game to a name no one expected. With all the weapons, fantasy plays and big names on that offense, this was the play that helped almost no one in their fantasy matchups Sunday
So, to be clear, we live in a fantasy world where Hendershot gets his shot at the end zone and Drake London goes full halloween costume on Sunday playing the role of the invisible man.
Verdict: Two buckets – because if you were relying on either of these players, you were already doomed.
Tom Brady has been killing every opponent in the NFL for years. Sunday, he kept that same energy for all of our parlays.
At the sportsbook PointsBet, 96% of the money bet on this game was on the Bucs. And why wouldn’t it be?!?!?! So, to recap, the Panthers trade CMC to go in full tank mode and then they beat Brady’s Bucs? Misery loves company, though… because we all thought this was a sure thing
The eye rolling fact is that if the playoffs started today, somehow this Bucs team would be division champions and host a playoff game. Gross. I think I speak for most football fans when I say that I get some twisted joy whenever I can watch Brady lose. But when it costs us all money? Crank up the Alanis Morisette and let’s all sing “Isn’t it Ironic” together.
Verdict: Five buckets. It’s like raiiiinnnnn on your wedding day.
Remember early in the season when we were wondering if the Jags were any good? Now, combine that with the fact that we spend every week questioning if the Giants are as good as their record and maybe this game was the chance to prove the naysayers wrong on both sides. Y’all obviously were believers in the Giants, though.
My friends, though, it is a game of inches.
I would usually give this one bucket, because Jags fans are used to heartbreak and New York fans were paying more attention to the Yankees’ loss to care about this one, but then I saw this parlay and I think we can all throw tears in for this guy.
Verdict: Three buckets
Saturday shenanigans came in the form of money line chaos that had all of us in our feels. Texas is back….to breaking their fans’ hearts. Dr. Quinn Medicine Ewers has looked like the elixir that could fix anything and everything that ails the Longhorns but he doesn’t kick field goals. And apparently, neither does this kid.
The Cowboys took advantage of the missed kick, drove down the field and won the game. Now, if that wasn’t last second enough for you drama fanatics, how about this at the end of Arizona State vs. Stanford
Instead of the chance to kick a game winning field goal, Arizona State falls to Stanford and money line bettors everywhere feel sick.
Verdict: Three buckets that are poured out for all of our money line losing brothers and sisters.
I know, I know… we’re focused on football. But this was too good not to include. The NBA season might just be underway, but it’s old enough to give us heartbreak already. Saturday’s matchup between the Los Angeles Clippers and Sacramento Kings reminded us that Sacramento can’t even lose right. Nothing like a wild corner three that has no shot of going in (until it does) having a massive impact to everyone’s wallets.
NBA action is fantastic… am I right?
Verdict: Five tears. It’s too soon to be going through this.
Patrick must have nerves of steel. This is an entire parlay of “maybes” that worked out in every right way. It’s a big win, so he definitely owes the crew a round of drinks.
Dinner, though, is on Drew! While every show on ESPN this week is going to ask what is wrong with the Packers, Drew knew what would be right, apparently. Aaron Jones delivered and now Drew better be taking us all out to a nice steak dinner. I’m talking cloth napkins, man.
Got any bad beats of your own? Let me know on Twitter @jasonfitz.